Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Right? or Self-righteous?

I spent much of yesterday patting myself on the back for my restraint.  Despite perceived provocation, I did not interfere in the work or conversations of others more than once, and that was to factually state calendar information for next week.  I was a well behaved girl.  I wasn't even particularly upset with things that went on, even though I had my fingers slapped (figuratively) and my emails ignored.  I worked behind the scenes, I controlled my temper, and I made sure that my staff didn't get trapped into senseless tasks that could be completed more effectively and efficiently using automated tools.

But, this morning, as I was standing in the shower, I started to get angry.  Why should I let this other co-worker snap at me, ignore me, and direct my staff.  Why should I let this other co-worker dictate the terms of our engagement?  Why should I hold back for the good of the office when she gives inappropriate tasking to a staff member?  Why should I let her speak to me with anger on more than one occasion? 

I have only one recourse in the office, our mutual boss.  He is a terrific person, and I have found him to be a great boss, and manager, but he isn't perfect.  We none of us are.  In this instance, I believe he is focusing on peace rather than resolution.  I know he is tired.  I know he is stressed.  I know she dislikes working with me as much as I dislike working with her.  We probably both think the other one is useless, and stupid, and a waste of space on the project, but darn it all, I'm in the right!!!

Aren't I?

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