Thoughts on civility

I have been thinking a lot about civility lately.  What it means, and what effect it has on our daily interactions with others.

There are numerous definitions online, but the one that struck home was Merriam-Webster's "a : civilized conduct; especially : courtesy, politeness b : a polite act or expression."  


Being civil to others is a sign of maturity.  That means opening doors for someone, or holding the door and allowing someone to walk through first -- not just men to women, but women to women, and women to men. It means holding the elevator door, and not talking on your cellphone (or texting) in a movie.  


Acts of civility set us apart from other animals, and unfortunately, it is something that seems to be disappearing from certain parts off society.  Pushing and shoving and cutting in line, the me first attitude is not restricted to the Me First generation. 


Perhaps my lament for the death of civility is driven by recent experiences, and by a creeping desire to be uncivil that I am seeing in myself.  It is not a pleasant feeling when I find myself wanting to stab the "Close" button on the elevator, or I am frustrated because someone else nabbed the last good seat on the metro train (not the last seat, just the last good one). 


So what can I do to return civility to my life.  I can make an effort to hold the elevator door; to offer my seat on the metro to someone older than I; to hold the door for someone whose arms are full; and to continue to say good morning and how are you to the person who never responds and never returns the greeting.  


But if it drives that person crazy that I speak to them at all, am I being civil by saying "good morning,"  or is that the ultimate act of incivility!